Oh the beauty of small and simple things

This is Mini's portrait of my face-she made sure to put my white spot that surrounds one of my moles-I honestly laughed so hard and made sure to take a picture because it was so priceless.

I woke up not in such a great mood and being at the Otara market was okay but I just knew what I really needed to feel a little bit better was a good short run in the sun. So when I got home I did just that. Running felt so great and then helping with the house cleaning was such a relaxing event and it felt great just to be joking with Mosiah and serving the family that does so much for me. Afterwards I did some homework and then Monique went out and Kara, Mini, and I were the only ones home, so after a while I realized that I should spend some time with Mini, and I am so glad I did. At first we just watched TV but I started to think about how childhood should be full of active engagement with life, and not just mindless time in front of the TV, so I suggested we play a game. Mini wanted us to try out her new card game, Pictureka, which asks the players to match up pictures with statements. For example, if a statement said 'hands' then a picture picked would have to have hands in it for the statement and picture to match. At the same time Mini practiced reading. She is a fantastic reader and what also is so wonderful is that when she came to a word like "North Pole" she came up with an example of something that lives in the North Pole, like Santa Claus. It was so adorable and I loved how she could give examples for different words, such as with "water" and "ice"-she knew those all related to something cold. It amazes me how smart children really are. The fun continued as we went into the sleep-out (Kara's and mine room) to draw pictures on her whiteboard. We started out drawing ourselves, but then we drew each other. As you see above, Mini is a great artist and she got me perfectly, even my hal0 spot ;)

I have been very blessed today to spend time with such an imaginative child, even though I started to get tired and couldn't wait for Monique to come home with food before the adult session of stake conference. I almost didn't take the opportunity to spend time with Mini, but as I was pondering on some questions from my scripture reading, I just got this feeling that I needed to spend time with this amazing child, so I listened. My questions haven't been answered, and frankly I don't know how to ask for help, but as it talks about in the Ensign about finding answers to life's questions on our own, David McKay has said, "That's his (her) problem." If a prophet believes and expects us to find answers to our own problems instead of constantly asking for help, I am sure that Heavenly Father expects that too. My questions right now are very much the same that they have been for the past year: should I do the internship and then teach for a few years? Will I even be an effective, motivated teacher? What about a mission? Could I even handle a mission? Is my testimony strong enough? Will I conquer my fears and start to live with confidence like I should? What about marriage and meeting the right person? Today I was wondering about the mission question and I really don't know what I should do or what questions would be right to ask to my Heavenly Father. I know He lives and loves me and all of His children, but there are so many doubts as to my ability to really give up of my time for 18 months in service for the Lord. Frankly, I am a selfish girl and so used to being helped and doing things for me. I wish I would have had a job in high school and that I started saving for a mission, but I didn't. However, I am more determined to seriously think about serving a mission and how I can start now to save up for such a noble calling. Deep down all I really want and I am sure most people want is to do the right thing.

Thank you for letting me put my questions out there and the thoughts of my heart. It's been a wonderful ending to a rough start, and even with lots of questions still on my mind, I have confidence that as I do my part, the Lord will take care of the rest.

Love,
Allison